C1 Chapter 1: Mary

Arriving in Salem we change our identity. I am no longer Maria Winterberg. From now on, my name is Mary Willows. It will be a while before I get used to not speaking German anymore, but English is no problem for me. I’ve always liked speaking English. Father always urged us to learn, even before … well, before all this happened to my sister.

He has always been keen to educate us culturally, historically, and socially. Even as a little girl I learned a lot about history, including that of America. We visited the opera, enjoyed festivals, and got to know the customs and idiosyncrasies of the bourgeoisie – or as one would say here: upper-class . Elisabeth, I mean Elizabeth of course, never seemed particularly interested in these cultural gatherings, but rather in … other things. Mother, too, did not really approve of father's urge to teach us anything – of course not, since the view still holds that women have no business in school and should take care of the housework. But father has always been different in this respect and taught me one thing better: knowledge is power.

I’ve been interested in everything since I can remember. I want to know more, learn more, experience more. I want to reach for the stars like Mrs. Eimmart. But I wonder if this will also be possible here – in Salem?

It won’t be easy with my sister, but one thing I’ve always craved more than knowledge is harmony. I want things to go back to the way they were. I want to be happy with my sister. Singing, dancing, playing, laughing with her … But all that doesn’t seem to interest her anymore. She has discovered a new passion, but she doesn’t realize that she is being dragged deeper and deeper into the darkness by it. What can I do to stop it? How can I talk to her without her blaming me again?

For some time now she only sees the bad. As if everyone wished her evil and no matter how hard I try, in the end it only gives her the impression that I want to convert her. She no longer sees me as her beloved sister, but as a rival. I’m the good poster child, and she’s the crazy freak. That’s what she thinks. But I’ve never seen it that way; I know it’s not true and what’s really behind this youthful defiance – a compassionate sister. I hope so much that it really is only a temporary phase of defiance. I want her back the way she was. But somehow I have a bad feeling.

I had many friends in our old homeland. I liked it there; after all, it is the place where I grew up. Nevertheless, I try to suppress the negative things and concentrate on the positive. I’m sure it will be very nice here as soon as we have settled in. A new home promises a new challenge. And I am full of energy and more than ready to embark on this adventure!